It Sucks

I don't know. I really don't know. Our relationship is still fragile even if we've given countless promises to each other. I shouldn't be fussy. Yeah. But I could never stop worrying about our future, though it's silly to worry about something you can't change no matter it's due to your incapability or the existing fact. I feel a mess. Awful mood, chaos keeps on, being bothered... I feel powerless and furious that leads me violently in the same time. I'm totally screwed. I feel suck. Gosh damn it, you would never know what am I feeling right now, this mess which damaged me so much,... which makes me feel somehow I'm losing you...
I think it might be okay to lose you when we fought. Because I got so mad at you and selfishly just wanted to protect myself as well as I could from hurts. I can't deny that I need you, that's the reason why I'm being so fragile and weak. What could I say? Does love never fail you?

Every morning

　I love every morning that I can wake up lazily with talking with you and listening to you under the lovely sun, because I can scruplousless indulge in your voice and keep closing my heavy eyes. Although you sometimes complain that "Oh! everytime when I talk with you you're always sleepy!" But you always still considerately tell me to close my eyes to get enough rest. I crazily want to fall into sleep with hugging you when you say that, for you'd know, you are always on my mind whenever. In spite of answering your "good morning" and "baby wake up" with my lazy sleepy voice, but every sentence of "I love you" I said to you still are the earnest and sincerest of me. I maye be the laziest cat among all of cats you've had, but I also am the cat which is the most unale to leave you.
　　Me: Baby, Where are your arms?
　　Baby: "Here, I'm just next to you."
　　Me: Ummmm,......... (closing my eyes...) I love you...
　　Baby: "I love you love you love you love you..."